The only way to help yourself with negative thinking is to
first become aware of when you’re thinking negatively and what you’re saying to
yourself. Without that self-awareness you won’t be able to stop negative
thinking in its tracks. And that’s really the only time to make a significant
dent. However, anytime you become more aware, that too is helpful! This article
will explore types of negative thinking and what you can do to cope with it.
There are many forms of negative thinking. Learning about
them is also a way to become more self aware. When you learn that there are
certain thoughts that can be harmful and you recognize that you have them from
time to time, then the next time you have that type of thought you might be
able to stop yourself. Types of negative thinking include:
Filtering – This
is a form of selective hearing and seeing. You see and hear things that confirm
what you believe about yourself, others, and the world. However, the beliefs we
have may not be healthy. For instance, a person might believe that they are
unlovable. As a result, they might see and hear things that only confirm this
negative belief.
Polarizing – This
is also known as black and white or all or nothing thinking. For instance, a
person might think to themselves, “If I don’t get this right, I’m a failure.”
With this type of thinking, there’s little room in between.
Overgeneralization – This
is a person’s tendency to take one detail in their experience and making it a
general rule about their lives. For instance, you might try your hand at a
business. And when it fails, you might conclude that you are a failure at all
things in your life.
Mind
reading – This is when a person believes that what they are
thinking to themselves is the same types of thoughts that others are having
about them too. At a party, for instance, if you are feeling extremely anxious,
you might believe that others can see your anxiety too and have judgments about
you as you are having judgments about yourself.
Self-blame – This
is when a person takes the blame for any and everything, whether they are
responsible for it or not.
Personalization – This
is when someone takes everything personally and believes that everything that
happens is because of something they did or said.
Shoulds: This
is the controlling facet of a person’s mind that likes to remind you of what
you should be doing or what you should have done. This can quickly erode a
person’s self esteem.
These are a few examples of negative thinking. Being
judgmental of oneself or others, gossiping, or talking down about others can be
considered negative. If you want to put an end to thinking negatively, you
might begin by documenting your thoughts on a daily basis. Write down any
negative thoughts you had that day and if you had any associated feelings. Were
there any events or experiences that triggered the negative thinking? And what
kind of thought would you use to replace the negative thought?
For instance, you might find that today you had the thought,
“I’m a failure.” You can replace that thought with something that might be more
reasonable. For instance, you might think instead, “I might fail at some things
but that does not make me a failure. I also have strengths, abilities, and
successes in my life.”
Negative thinking is not easy to end right away. It’s going
to take time. And it will change as you continue to become more aware and work
at consciously replacing those old thoughts for new and healthy ones.
